Wednesday, June 24, 2015
In an exclusive interview with The Grapevine over a cup of tea on a remote beach in New Zealand's Far North,
Mrs Key's little boy and Prime Monster of New Zealand, John, has admitted that Parliament's opposition parties
do have good ideas.
"Yea nah to be honest with you Keith, I'm well aware that only three people read The Grapevine so I can be sure that nobody who matters will ever know this but yes it's true, those opposition parties do come up with good ideas damn them".
Just then a young woman wandered past with her dog and John hurriedly jumped up and attempted to pull her ponytail before she quickly kicked him in the gonads and resumed her beach walk.
John came back to his cup of tea, visibly shaken, not stirred."I couldn't help it".
And after a few moments continued. "The problem is if I acknowledge any of their ideas are good and agree to an accommodation with them for the good of the country, I'd look silly.
Bill, Stephen, Jerry and the boys would laugh at me. Judith would have a bloody field day.
I'd lose face. I just can't do it.
All I can do is ridicule them and their damn ideas and then after a while, present the same ideas as mine.
Look Keith, I've got to go, I've really appreciated this confidential little chat. I hope we can do it again.
It's so hard to find someone to trust these days"...
Saturday, June 13, 2015
that his party will pledge to the people of New Zealand that at the next general election in 2017,
he will seek a mandate for Labour to become the Permanent Opposition Party in the New Zealand Parliament.
"We've done it before and we've proven we're good at it" he said enthusiastically.
"It makes my life easier too, it means that as a political party we don't have to come up with silly social policies which are always difficult to get agreement on in our caucus.
We'll just be able to party".
More like a wake perhaps but, you heard it here...
Wednesday, June 03, 2015
the council will have to consider raising the amount of fines to cover expenses.
Even though the council gave out more than ten million dollars worth of fines last year,
the problem is that with parking infringement fines at a measly $12 the rate of revenue is just not enough to cover costs.
There are some councilors who haven't had an all expenses paid overseas holiday for months.
And making matters worse, some of the city's parking wardens are insisting on being polite, kind and considerate
and giving errant motorists a ten minute time window to top up their meters.
You heard it here...